


Not Part of a Normal Desire

by ButterflyGhost



Series: North by Northwest: due South poems [3]
Category: due South
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Internal Monologue, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-30
Updated: 2012-03-30
Packaged: 2017-11-02 18:21:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/371960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ButterflyGhost/pseuds/ButterflyGhost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Still trying to nudge myself to a better understanding of Ray Kowalski. There's a wonderful line in his monologue in Burning Down the House, where he says "this was never part of a normal desire." Okay, so he's referring to being in a burning car with a Mountie on the roof, a deaf wolf in the back seat, heading towards the Lake They Call Michigan. But I think his life goes down some very weird routes, none of which are "normal." Which is what I'm trying to explore here... he's lost a lot of the cultural identifiers that would form his core identity... lost his wife, undercover with a new name... As he says, not part of a normal desire.</p></blockquote>





	Not Part of a Normal Desire

This wasn't ever part  
Of a normal desire,  
My whole life up in flames  
And I'm burning in the fire.  
All I ever wanted  
Was a name to call my own,  
For somebody to see me  
Who's heart could be my home.  
But all that burned to nothing,  
And I'm lonely, long gone.  
It's like I never had nothing,  
No normal desire.

So, the car's on fire  
But we're still moving  
And I'm spilling my guts  
But we're still weaving  
And I think that I'm invisible  
I know that he's not hearing  
But I got it off my chest  
And at least that's …  
Something.

Something maybe.

And he pulls me from the water,  
And he calls me by my name,  
And it's something.  
Yeah, something maybe.

You know,  
This was never part  
Of a normal desire.

**Author's Note:**

> Still trying to nudge myself to a better understanding of Ray Kowalski. There's a wonderful line in his monologue in Burning Down the House, where he says "this was never part of a normal desire." Okay, so he's referring to being in a burning car with a Mountie on the roof, a deaf wolf in the back seat, heading towards the Lake They Call Michigan. But I think his life goes down some very weird routes, none of which are "normal." Which is what I'm trying to explore here... he's lost a lot of the cultural identifiers that would form his core identity... lost his wife, undercover with a new name... As he says, not part of a normal desire.


End file.
